June 21, 2009

. . .

so many thoughts are just scrambled and crammed in my brain tonight. so i will try to go in some kind of order. it's father's day and though i've fought acknowledging that, there is no getting around it. looking at that statement, it makes me think that i'm resenting father's day - i'm not. i loved my father beyond anything really. and i miss him. i look at my nieces and nephews and know in my heart how happy he would be surrounded by them. but ... he was not without his flaws. the thing is, now that he's gone - those flaws really do not matter anymore. the bottom line is that he loved me (and my brothers and sisters) unconditionally. end of sentence.

also, related to this is the book i read this week - the shack. this book has been recommended to me by so many people over the year that i couldn't tell you all who passed on that word. i resisted it ... well, as the aunt of two adorable girls, the unspeakable that happens in this book ... long story short - it effected me as deeply as i expected it too and i spent the majority of the book weeping. which violates my ban on reading books or watching movies that i know will lead to buckets of tears.

anyway - to me the baseline of the book is about unconditional love and how when we judge or put limitations on love, then we put ourselves outside of complete love. it's a difficult concept at times to wrap your head around, but if i think about it - it's how i have deal with the flaws that my father had. and how i loved him in spite of all of the things that happened during his dark time.

wow, that's not the direction i expected this to go; however, it is my belief that love is the thing really. love is the thing.

now, the beach. wow - the weather was gorgeous but the heat was triple digits and this southern flower doesn't like the beach when it's so hot you can't bear it. it seems the past two beach vacations have been at the hottest time of year - is it any wonder my favorite beach time is in october or november? but, i'm not complaining - i'm not. four free days (and nights) at the beach with two of the most beautiful girls in the world - that's living people. plus, amazing photography opportunities.

we were in seaside - a cute, funky little restort town filled with cute bungalows and airstream trailers. the taco bar there had the best shrimp tacos i've ever eaten and i have to figure out how to duplicate them. the strawberry daquiris were also yummy. there were tons of bicycles everywhere. this area also has a number of bog lakes that are filled with gorgeous waterlilies and cat tails. i spent two days trying to find one that i could get close to and hit paydirt on thursday. i think i took 50+ shots of the lotus blooms (which close during the day so you have to catch them early) and waterlilies. so beautiful. and of course - the girls - amazing to spend that much time with them. the baby hates the beach and after the first day refused to go back. ga adored the pool and the beach - totally in her element.

i'll tell you about dinner with the new jersey housewives tomorrow. yes, i'm such a tease.,


  1. i don't know your story-or your dads. but i do know that father's day isn't the same for everyone. me included. anyhow, i don't know exactly the right thing to say, except to give you a (:
    glad you had a good vacation! and i love vacation stories! will check back soon!

  2. oh Seaside is such a wonderful place. i love it there. despite the heat, i'm sure it was fun - there's so much to do there.

  3. it is amazing how time changes everything, isnt it? with time, you realise how the flaws dont quite matter.

  4. IT'S funny how you said the flaws don't matter, I am quickly realizing this...My husband came home with a chocolate cream pie, showed it to me and I bburst into tears.....It was my Dads favorite pie, how can a piece of pie make me cry....i know next year it may be better.....your last post those photos were awesome, i like the last one the best. I am so glad you had a great time at the beach. take care. cinner

  5. I love my Dad too Char. I am greatful he is still here and he does the best he can despite his struggles. All I know is I got see my children tonight and I know they love me and still want to snuggle with me and it makes my heart swell. I hope they always feel like they come over the couch and scootch in and snuggle their heads in the crook of my neck.

  6. It's funny how our perspective evolves and changes with the holidays as the years pass. I know mine have, where I find a much more personal essence in them now than I have in the past. And the beach getaway sounds perfect, can't wait to see those bog ponds, sounding very ethereal!

  7. ummm...did you know that seaside is where part of my heart was left many years ago when I feel in love with it ?

    were you reading me back in january when I supposed to have a whole month in seaside and had to cut the trip early due to our teenager being a little &$@*

    did you know we have been visiting there yearly for the past 12 years or so and love it best in october ?

    did you know that I'm so freaking jealous of you right now knowing that's where you were ?

    did you know that if you ever want to plan a blogger girls tribe trip there, I'll be there so fast it will make your head spin ?

    did you know that we have gotten to love watercolor, too, even though it will never be seaside ?

    did you know that we love the same place and I'm dying to know which cottage you stayed in ?

    did you know that you might have already told me you love seaside and that my memory is something I have a hard time relying on anymore !!


  8. I adore seaside! I always make a point to drive there for a day when we are down there. V absolutely loves the bookstore, this year she picked a book about turtles and we lucked out and the author was there to sign it for her!

  9. lovely post on love. not enough people talk about love. i think a lot of people are afraid to, or can't, because they are not really sure how to define it. that's okay. it still should be talked about. it's nice to see it written about, and not just in the typical blog way—"i love that skirt" or "i love love love this photo" or "i love trips to the mountains".

    thanks. glad you had good weather on your trip. can't wait to hear more—jersey housewives??? i'm intrigued.

  10. After reading your post, and the responses to it, I now have to put Seaside on my "go to" list! I've never been to NJ...one of the few states that isn't coming or going for us. But it sounds fabulous. I love your photos, as well. The only thing I know about NJ is from reading Janet Evonvich books - which is not a great testimonial, I'm sure, but they're great beach reads:).

  11. yes, the best time for the beach (at least in the S.E.) is fall. The light is so serene, the temperatures - perfection, the bugs so few, the roads a little less crowded, ahhh fall on the coast, (too bad it's followed by winter but hey how would I learn to appreciate the rest of the year so much)

  12. NJ housewives,... hmmmm... you have me waiting for your next post!

  13. Tears to cleanse the soul aren't all bad. Lovely post, my dear.

  14. Seaside, Florida! What fun! I love the beach but have never been there. My friends in Biloxi usually go to Destin. My favorite beaches are in North Carolina.
    So glad you had a wonderful time despite the heat. And do tell about the housewives . . .

    I'm shocked, too because your blog is so different.

  15. Fathers, flaws, forgiveness, love, heat, photo ops, Seaside AND dinner with the Housewives of New Jersey...girl you crammed those four days full!

  16. ...all you need is love indeed...:)

  17. The shack.... ah yes! I have the audio, and listen to it over and over... there is always something new to discover. And when I weep, I can just close my eyes....


i feel as if each comment was between us as we sat and sipped something warm....i love to hear what you're thinking.