February 5, 2010

at the chime of a city clock.

i opened a new post and sat there.  wondering what to say or even sometimes how much to say. 
  not that i really have a lot to say...besides the clouds are gray and dreary.  and i'm worried about sitting in an airport all day on sunday. 
as i fly off to the north.  or as i call it - the great white north.  even though they say it's still below the mason-dixon line and southern living often posts little articles about it.
and i thumbed through pictures though i haven't taken a lot lately and the ones i liked, i've already shared. 
and i took a picture of my breakfast as i read through a new-to-me book of prayers.  i picked it up because it had the word "mockingbird" in the title and a cute little drawing of a mockingbird on the cover.  but the prayers drew me in and though i don't really talk about religion much, i felt a kinship with them as they seemed to be simple talk from a person that is struggling every day to be a good person.  and i liked that.  as i read, i thought me too.
and i have a lot of thoughts lately of being quick to judge - judgy mcjudgerson - sometimes that's me - sometimes that is the feeling i have of other people.  and as i've written before we all do these things and perhaps some of you struggle with that too.  it's heavy on my mind today.  a message from the universe i think since i'm struggling...too often i find when especially confronted by an issue that it's a lesson that i need to learn for myself. 
  being a socialized introvert i'm struggling too with the sudden urge to curl into myself and hibernate.  not unlike phil who saw his shadow and decided to take a few weeks more.  in doing this, i turned my calendar and reminded myself - it is only six weeks until spring.  that means in a few weeks that japanese magnolias will begin to bloom and daffodils will peek and give the all clear for other flowers to follow.  the grass will come forth underneath this dull brown carpet.  so, i firmly put my feet forward instead of the curled position. 
  it's friday and i'm tired and though i shouldn't complain after a ten month vacation, it's been a roller coaster this week.  but i have a sense of accomplishment too that we had a good kick-off to our project. 

i leave you with a small list of things that are good today
- a job well done and a completed task list
- the bowl of grits, eggs and cheese i had for breakfast
- a blue dish of creamy chocolates
- listening to nick drake while i'm typing
- ginger mandarin hand lotion
- ribbon bookmarkers in my books
- vintage prayer books
 

39 comments:

  1. I'm a socialized introvert too, it's a constant struggle but probably a good thing for me. Have a great weekend!

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  2. Char, wow you had me thinking with this one. I too would consider myself a social introvert, I think because of my fear of falling with my Cataplexy. Blog land has helped me with that. I like how you describe Spring, it will come soon! I hope you can find time to get some rest. you have been a busy little bee. Big hugs to you! Have a good trip.

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  3. Please share some of the prayers from your book...I would love to hear them. Judge~we are all guilty of that one...I think its just our human nature when we don't agree with something or someone. YOur list is good today!
    Mine is just busy busy!

    Until spring come.....

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  4. I love all the things that are good today. And what's so wrong (when a person's able) to curl up and hibernate for a few days?
    I'm often judgmental, especially with the parents at school. Well, I am to myself. I'd never say anything to them. I don't know their life. I only know how some of them treat their children.

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  5. first I need to know where that lotion is from....K ?

    and second....even if your feet, that are moving forward, decide to curl up for a few days or a week....heck, what's wrong with that ? we can't keep going if our body has other ideas...especially in the winter...so if you need permission, I am totally giving it to you....K ?

    because around here....I curl up often, with a book or a movie or my journal and it does wonders for me...and it's the cheapest therapy EVER !

    will be thinking of you while you travel !!!

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  6. This is definitely the time of year to curl up. This weekend here it'll only get into the 20s, perfect staying inside and curling up weather! Fireplace, coffee brewing, good stuff. Have a nice weekend, and enjoy your trip!

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  7. I love eggs and grits!
    Bright Bold and Beautiful weekend wishes sent your way ~~~

    xoxo

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  8. I really want to know what grits are. after watching The Secret Life of Bees they don't seem very appealing (her father made her kneel on them as punishment).

    There with ya on the judgement thing. So easy to do sometimes but so soul destroying for both the judger and judgiee
    I've recently been aware that judging myself is something I do on a way to regular basis which is just as bad.

    your ginger hand lotion sounds divine

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  9. safe travels.i am thinking of you..you write so comfortably..like the tree image here

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  10. I know what you mean about wanting to hibernate...some days that is the only think I think that I can handle doing. I'm glad that you found some comfort in your prayer book and remembering the good things for the day. Listening to Nick Drake is always something I do when I am in a thoughtful or to-myself kind of mood. Enjoy the weekend and safe travels!

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  11. I love the teal-hue in that sky. Your photos are dynamic.
    And you've hit so many things in this post that I relate to. I'm always in danger of curling inward. That is one reason I'm so glad I blog now and am communicating with creative people. I've learned how much we have in common and how supportive we all can be.
    Your list is wonderful.

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  12. i hope that you have safe travels. my guy said they are getting lots of the white stuff. you should make a snowman. that's good therapy too. sometimes i want to curl up too. because rest is good. and so is being busy. it's a balance. so judgy, rest tomorrow before your madness begins again!

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  13. I certainly know the feeling of wanting to just curl up. It's not the worst thing. Get some rest, take some photos, eat another bowl of grits & be done with this week. Have a GOOD weekend!

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  14. Mandarin and ribbon bookmarks...love your list...I have been struggling for a couple of days...and ended up with an eye stabbing headache...all better now.
    Makes you wonder though!
    Have a great Saturday...Sunday...and everyday from then on...
    :-)
    Char

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  15. how beautifully honest...is ther anything more beautiful than an honest soul? you are so wonderful! i too am constantly tempted to hibernate instead of facing the world...thank you for sharing and making me feel not so alone in this world.

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  16. Congrats on finishing your project! I hope whatever you're doing, you take time to just relax and enjoy this weekend!

    xo Mary Jo

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  17. perfect list Char~enjoy your weekend~you deserve it!

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  18. im glad im not the only one who sits with a new post template and wonders what to say!

    ribbon bookmarks - love them. use them a lot.

    enjoy your weekend.

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  19. I love your ramblins! I hope you can take some time to just relax this weekend...

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  20. Oh Char, I relate to the internal struggles you are going through..and it's easy to feel more of a social introvert when you are struggling internally...I feel I have to pull myself away from people and things to get a better perspective on things..it helps usually...and then I feel I can be my usual charming social self- Ok..I'm not really that social normally..but there is a noticable difference when I've got something on my mind and when everything is just peachy!!
    Have a great weekend!

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  21. I think you'd be surprised as even people who are seem as extroverted can feel a little of what you experience. Internally I struggle in groups that I don't know well even if I look like I'm OK with it. Quite frankly I don't even think I look comfortable in big groups.

    Your hand lotion sounds so luxurious.

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  22. Put me on the socialized introvert list, please? I'm much more comfortable sitting in my cozy house with a book and a cuppa or on a quiet hiking trail than going out into the world. Not that I'm a recluse, but I prefer reading and writing over talking.

    Speaking of bookmarks, I'm stuck inside the house today with some of the grands and I was just thinking it would be nice if I had some felt on hand for them to make some bookmarks for me.

    Be safe on your trip.

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  23. ooooo I need some cheese and eggs now!!

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  24. me, too. grits with cheese and eggs would be perfect!

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  25. i love cheesy grits and better with shrimp! add some pole beans and cornbread and i am in heaven.
    i have to remind myself when i feel judged, it is usually cause i have been judgmental, but it is hard not to be...i doubt i will ever be completely non judgmental...just a work in progress. Relax in you can this weekend.

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  26. Have a safe trip! I too can't wait for spring, and the flowers to bloom!

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  27. I hope you are not coming to the east coast on Sunday since many of our airports are closed for the blizzard of '10. Your breakfast sounds wonderful by the way.

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  28. your prayer book sounds lovely. and vintage. sigh.
    xo

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  29. "Judgy McJudgerson" this name
    just cracked me up! I'm glad
    that you came upon this vintage
    find and that it moved you so.

    Be careful on your trip!

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  30. great list....and being a socialized introvert? yep...i totally understand that one! safe travels, friend.

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  31. We all have our struggles, no? The sun is out where I am, and that definitely helps lift my spirits. I hope, wherever you are today, the sun is out and you allow yourself the time to curl up and rest as much as you need to, dear Char. Don't be too hard on yourself. I love that you ended the post with a list of accomplishments.

    xoxo,
    -maria

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  32. I'm just a plain old hermit. An old-fashioned word. I'm not introverted around people I know. But then in actuality I don't know that many people. Most of my friends are right here in blog land. I love how I can see your thoughts laid out in an introspective fashion.
    Brenda

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  33. I've been doing a lot of curling and hibernating too...I so get that. It's funny how we are as the seasons change. I know that at the end of summer, I am so excited for fall to come..for the colours to change and for the air to become crisp and I say to myself, THIS is my favourite season.....but right about now, when I've had enough of the colder weather and I'm looking around for any sign of new green or new bulbs peeking out of the ground, I think, no, THIS is my favourite season.

    I am so glad we have the cyclical rhythm of the changing seasons to nudge us here and there, sometimes out of our self imposed hibernations.

    Love to you.

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  34. THANKS SWEET LADY FOR VOTING FOR ME :-)
    Char.x.

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  35. Char...how i loved your list...and YES ! vintage prayer books...lovely


    more later, my friend,
    kary

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  36. ribbon bookmakers-i need to start reading
    completed task lists-sigh
    chocolates-indulgence

    this makes me want to curl up and hibernate ;)

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  37. I try hard not to be a judgy mcjudgerson too - it's hard. Is it human nature? I find myself being hypocritical too; saying to my BF, "Oh don't say that judgement about that person, it's not nice." Then I turn around and judge... that prayer book sounds lovely...

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  38. I appreciate "simple talk" too. Sometimes life gets a little too intellectual and serious. Some honest simple thoughts shared by someone willing to share their challenges in getting through the day-to-day seems refreshing.

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  39. Oh, me too. On the judgy-mcjudgerson, the introversion and hibernation, and the longing for spring - even though winter here is nothing like the winter that I left behind in New England. Spring will come, you are right. big hugs to you!

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i feel as if each comment was between us as we sat and sipped something warm....i love to hear what you're thinking.