how did it get to be thursday already?

julie is having an interview party and she graciously interview me, along with dozens of other bloggy friends (new and old.)  i love interviews as i always learn something new about people and something fun.  it's also a great way to meet new people....

i have a beautiful piece of artwork given to me by the talented diahn that i'm getting framed but i'm bringing it to the office as i want to look at it every day. 

and you know what.....i'm going to stop here.  i've typed and erased other random stuff several times now and i think it's just better that i save those for another day.

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today on my ipod - if i ever leave this world behind (flogging molly), 100 years (5 for fighting), love will keep us alive (the eagles), follow through (gavin degraw), until i fall away (gin blossoms), everlong (foo fighters), time after time (cyndi lauper), sea of love (cat power), hideaway (the weepies)

what do zz top and david bowie have in common?

this started out as a blog talking about artists' need for validation and despite it all, there is usually at least a whisper of insecurity that rears it's ugly head from time to time. 

but, after a good talking to by my instructor and a healthy helping of pulling my head out of my own ass, i will not bore you with the details of said insecurity.  it's never pretty. 

instead i will tell you the beauty of the full-ish moon peeking her buttery head over dark storm clouds and the silvery bolts dancing and jumping to the thunder's song last night.  as the rain fell and fell and fell, i drove south - hazard lights on as i inched along the highway with an 18-wheeler and a red chevy. i cleared my head.  i released some of the pressure i've been falsely attributing to other sources.  i listened to the sheer poetry of dylan, petty and lovett - marveling in their words.  i got home safely and was glad to be in my bed.

so, my question is - how do you deal with insecurity?  we know we're our own worst critics, right?  how do you move past the "everything i do lately is crap" phase?

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today on my ipod - she's my kind of rain (tim mcgraw), i won't back down (tom petty), born to run (bruce springsteen), sunday morning coming down (johnny cash), lie to me (jonny lang), scarlet begonias (grateful dead), hurricane (bob dylan), private conversation (lyle lovett), tiny dancer (elton john), landslide (stevie nicks)

it's friday and i love a list (three days late and probably more than a few dollars short)

i didn't get to post my friday list, well...on friday.  so, breaking the rules...here's my friday list on monday....

reasons that summer in the deep south kinda sucks:
1.  humidity - good personal grooming habits are almost impossible to maintain if you go outside in july or august.
2.  heat - it's been in excess of the mid-90's for several days, some days right at 100. 
3.  the heat index - i think these indexes are hinky science because frankly, once the thermometer goes over 90 - it's hot...totally hot.
4.  mosquitoes - they get as big as say...a small hummingbird.  or is it they just feel that way when they land. 

reasons that summer in the deep south kinda doesn't suck:
1.  honeysuckle - the sweet scent of honeysuckle on a warm night is romantic and makes me think of first kisses in the moonlight.
2.  fireflies - they're magical as they flit across the yard.  they make me believe in fairies, frolics and happy thoughts.
3.  swimming - lakes, swimming pools - wherever.  we can usually get in the water much earlier and stay much later.  and swimming in the dark under stars?  to overuse a phrase - magical.  makes me want to be a niaid. 
4.  fresh veg and fruit - though i don't grow my own, i love fresh peas, butterbeans, squash, cucumbers, okra and the other wonderful veg of summer.  and don't get me started on peaches and plums!  yum.

things my inner child is screaming to do today:
1.    play with bubbles
2.    crack open a new box of crayons (love that scent) and color to my heart's content
3.    have pjb and koolaid for lunch (grape is my favorite flavor)
4.    nap
5.    make a clover necklace
6.    eat birthday cake for dessert
7.    play connect the dots
8.    skip up and down the long hallway at work
9.    stamp my feet when faced with work i don't wanna do
10.  splash
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today on my ipod - fugitive (david gray), wanna be startin' somthin' (michael jackson), one big love (patty griffin), these are days (10,000 maniacs, born to fly (sara evans), fireflies (lori mckenna), steal my kisses (ben harper), with or without you (u2), words (ryan adams), slow dancing in a burnnig room (john mayer)

the shot today is from this week's homework assignment and it's called "prison break"

sunday procrasination and self-deprecation

there's the thing.  i discovered some things about myself this morning. 

i woke up with a deadline looming over my head, like the proverbial anvil hanging over wiley's head as he waits on the roadrunner (i also wonder why we knew wiley's name but never knew the roadrunner's name...)  anyway...this bad habit i have of digressing...

like any good procrastinator, i drove to starbucks to get coffee and breakfast.  and while i drove, i thought. i thought and i thought and, i thought again.  i've thought all week about creativity and how it's really difficult to be completely original and artistic stuff like that.  and...to me, there is nothing really new under the sun...it's been done.  so the best we can hope for is to come at this some new way.  so, i came home and brainstormed and came up with three or four solid ideas on a theme that i will try to shoot this afternoon (when the light is better.)

part of my brainstorming involved looking at old issues of artful blogger.  and i look at the talent of people out there and i came upon one blogger's list of what she wanted to do this summer and it was beautiful truly.  and i thought ... yes, i want to do those things too.  i want to write a beautiful love letter to summer.  and then i looked in to my mirror.  you know, reality and stuff like that.  and decided....this is a real summer.

this summer i will:

look at all the photographs of pickling and jam making and other canning things and drool...because i never make the time to do this.  and when i have, it usually turned out to be a big ol' hot mess.  so, i'll buy from the farmer's market.

not dream about going camping or any such as that.  it's too hot and the bugs are way too plentiful.  maybe i can make s'mores over the grill instead.  are campfire songs appropriate around the grill?

think about picking fresh fruit from the trees....or not.  again, the heat and bugs.  but i can make a fresh peach cobbler using fresh peaches that someone else picked.  does that count?

dream about handcrafting some article of clothing and will probably buy the stuff to do it.  and i may even start it....and get frustrated half-way through or interrupted by work demands.  my 'up close' eyes don't seem to work well anymore...even with bifocals.  damn this getting old.

buy two swimsuits in the hopes of going to the lake.  it's the end of july and i'm still waiting.  now i worry about the whiteness of my legs and the unattractive prospective of using fake tanner.  i can't be jackie o (in my mind) with big orange splotches on the backs of my thighs.

look at fireflies inviting me to play and dream about my childhood of catching them in the jar.  as i step outside and mosquitoes latch on like a bum at last call...i remember i really dislike the smell of off. *scratches arm*

wish i had made time to get that pedicure i wanted a month ago.  now i'm too ashamed to slink into the little place near me....i wonder if i should go to the other side of town where i would never been seen again.

work...work from the early morning until the sweltering heat of the day has set.  and i will be tired and brain dead and if i cook dinner that day, i will call it "good."

stare at the bicycle that sits in the corner of my bedroom and kick myself for not getting it out to ride. but then someone speeds down the street and i think that all i need is a broken leg and my big old butt on the pavement.  so i pet it and tell it that it's still pretty.  and fall is around the corner.


in addition to these lovely things that seem to happen to women that are crafting, pickling and doing wonderful things with their wonderful families...leaving people like me in awe....i will probably sweat enough to wish i had taken two showers.  oh wait, i'm a steel magnolia....let me wipe of my glow.

because i haven't done it in a while...

homework ('cause christina asked)

the assignment was a simple, artistic shot of something complex.  i missed the mark a bit though i love the light in the shot.  but there is still time to try again.  actually i submitted this shot in black & white (you can see it on my flickr.) 

i had missed the previous week when tony was sick and so i didn't hear the lecture - part of why i missed the mark on with this shot.  but, it's a good reason why attending classes is so much better than the notes.

this week's assignment will have everyone scrambling..it's creativity...the act of making "something" out of "nothing" which was the first definition of creation......talk about getting your thinking cap going.  i have a couple of ideas now, as always, is having the time and the resources to take concepts to reality.





and in other news....my new macro arrived in time for my birthday.  so i thought i would share my favorites from last sunday's non-class shots.