November 17, 2008

If I Should Fall

There will be sporadic reposts of stuff from my old myspace account that I have been gradually shutting down. Thanks for bearing with me my old friends that I adore, while I bring what I liked from over there to this cozier, friendlier home. Reading back over some of it, I remember the joy of writing and having a voice to speak. I see how I've progressed over the years and re-lived some of the ups and downs of my life. But, I know that it's mostly a good life. I'm blessed by having a good job, good relationships with my family and being able to (mostly) take care of myself.

That is saying a lot in these scary times. Though there is an air of hope after the election - the market and the economy are still taking a wild ride in Mr. Toad's car with no real guarantees of where we all will end up. Needless to say, I think the economic bubble of easier times and easier credit are gone like Scarlett's Tara...but out of it all, like Scarlett, we will build what we need to survive. And I know for some that will be easier than for others. Me, my hope that that I survive 2009 with a job intact. That is secretly - or not so secretly, my biggest fear.

See, I've never been without a job since I started working at age 15. Never. Today I have three or four friends that have been laid off and have yet to find a job....some have been that way for over a year. I can't even imagine. I have nightmares about being a door greeter at Wal-Mart (another of my dreaded places) as I'm at the indelicate age of not being young...but not old enough for retirement or social security.

*Breathes deep* I'm not putting negative energy out there. I know that I'm good at my job and I have value as being the only person that knows regulations like I do. They call that job security and I hope I have it. But still, I feel as though I'm walking along the highway in California with fires on one side and the ocean on the other. And if I should fall off a cliff, perhaps I will fly. Which reminds me of that BNL song:

If I Should Fall
I look straight in the window, try not to look below
Pretend I’m not up here, try counting sheep
But the sheep seem to shower off this office tower
It’s nine-point-eight straight down
I can’t stop my knees
I wish I could fly
From this building
From this wall
And if I should try
Would you catch me
If I fall?

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.


  1. wow........... I think you've put into words what a lot of us feel & fear. It is a scary time. I'm trying to do it on my own & am barely keeping my head above water (I'm talking basics like food & utilities) without really having a life!! On the bright side - I'm using the library a lot & going to the thrift store for my clothes - I look at it as recycling in the grandest sense!!

    Great post!

  2. such an important post....that photo is still a favorite for me...lovely. xo t

  3. You are so creative that I doubt you'll lose your job. They don't get rid of "good" people. Then again...if it does happen, you'll pick yourself right up and find something else that brings you income. Don't despair. I, too, can relate to your feelings though....these are scary times and I'm hoping the OBAMA years will make things better. This whole business of the Feds loaning cash to General Motors means saving a lot of jobs out there...but it would be nice if GM knew how to run a viable business. I have mixed many jobs would be at stake and it would trickle to other areas of industry. For the time being, let's cross our fingers and HUG, too. ;)
    Michael ;)

  4. Sometimes cleaning up and moving on is a really healthy thing. The 'space has entirely too much drama for me. I love your writing and I hope you'll continue to write to soothe your soul.

  5. Let's hope for better times SOON! Let's hope our media get a little more upbeat! Everyone seems to believe everything they say... they could help turn thngs around if they were more positive!

  6. Joy - it is recycling and I've started to do some of that too. We also trade books at work too so that helps.

    Mrs. - thank you...considering your photography, that's an honor.

    Michael - from your mouth to God's ear.

    GSG - I refuse to be caught up in drama. I graduated Sweet Valley High long ago! LOL I enjoy writing here as it's much warmer and more welcoming.

    Fifi - I think you are on to something. It's like the gas panic after the hurricanes. The media also creates a lot of problems.


i feel as if each comment was between us as we sat and sipped something warm....i love to hear what you're thinking.