. . .

so many thoughts are just scrambled and crammed in my brain tonight. so i will try to go in some kind of order. it's father's day and though i've fought acknowledging that, there is no getting around it. looking at that statement, it makes me think that i'm resenting father's day - i'm not. i loved my father beyond anything really. and i miss him. i look at my nieces and nephews and know in my heart how happy he would be surrounded by them. but ... he was not without his flaws. the thing is, now that he's gone - those flaws really do not matter anymore. the bottom line is that he loved me (and my brothers and sisters) unconditionally. end of sentence.

also, related to this is the book i read this week - the shack. this book has been recommended to me by so many people over the year that i couldn't tell you all who passed on that word. i resisted it ... well, as the aunt of two adorable girls, the unspeakable that happens in this book ... long story short - it effected me as deeply as i expected it too and i spent the majority of the book weeping. which violates my ban on reading books or watching movies that i know will lead to buckets of tears.

anyway - to me the baseline of the book is about unconditional love and how when we judge or put limitations on love, then we put ourselves outside of complete love. it's a difficult concept at times to wrap your head around, but if i think about it - it's how i have deal with the flaws that my father had. and how i loved him in spite of all of the things that happened during his dark time.

wow, that's not the direction i expected this to go; however, it is my belief that love is the thing really. love is the thing.

now, the beach. wow - the weather was gorgeous but the heat was triple digits and this southern flower doesn't like the beach when it's so hot you can't bear it. it seems the past two beach vacations have been at the hottest time of year - is it any wonder my favorite beach time is in october or november? but, i'm not complaining - i'm not. four free days (and nights) at the beach with two of the most beautiful girls in the world - that's living people. plus, amazing photography opportunities.

we were in seaside - a cute, funky little restort town filled with cute bungalows and airstream trailers. the taco bar there had the best shrimp tacos i've ever eaten and i have to figure out how to duplicate them. the strawberry daquiris were also yummy. there were tons of bicycles everywhere. this area also has a number of bog lakes that are filled with gorgeous waterlilies and cat tails. i spent two days trying to find one that i could get close to and hit paydirt on thursday. i think i took 50+ shots of the lotus blooms (which close during the day so you have to catch them early) and waterlilies. so beautiful. and of course - the girls - amazing to spend that much time with them. the baby hates the beach and after the first day refused to go back. ga adored the pool and the beach - totally in her element.

i'll tell you about dinner with the new jersey housewives tomorrow. yes, i'm such a tease.,